Mothers, Expectations & Relationships

Astrology is an amazing study, a symbolic language.  As we look at a person’s horoscope, each symbol leads us deeper and deeper into who this person is.  When we truly understand who a person is, at their core, there is not a lot of space for judgment, and even less room for self righteousness.
When I work with a chart I go through a bit of a ritual, taking time to look at this piece, then that, always in the same order with every chart.  The routine helps to maintain order in my thinking.
As I go through this process there comes a moment, sometimes sooner, sometimes later, when I suddenly feel that I can touch the reality of the person.  In that moment, on some existential level, I feel like I “get” them.
I remember the day, many years ago, when I was looking at my mother’s chart.  It must have been the first time I looked into it deeply, examining each piece in turn, awaiting that moment of understanding.  When it came, it came suddenly and felt like a blow to the chest, I was astonished!  I realized that my mother was not the woman I had thought she was all these years!  Being the youngest child, I was very close to my mother and I believed that I knew her well.
This was a very disturbing experience.  The woman I believed my mother to be was very clearly shown in my own chart.  My experience of her had little to do with her and almost everything to do with whom I believed her to be.
This realization brought much confusion to my thinking about all human relationships.  If I did not know my mother, whom I had spent more time with than any other person on the planet, how could I imagine that I knew anyone?  …  or that anyone knew, or ever would, know me?
To test my thinking, on this mother issue, I called each of my siblings and spoke to them (with their horoscopes in hand) basically interviewed them, about their (our) mother.  It was very clear through the conversations that even though the same woman gave birth and raised all five children in my family, we each had a very different mother.  Our experience of her was reflected in our charts.
Our relationships with our parents are pivotal in the development of the patterns that rule our adult significant relationships.  There is much that can be seen about our parents and our relationships with our parents within our own horoscopes.
Each of us comes into our lives with, an expectation, and idea, an archetype of the “mother” we will encounter.  Whatever woman gives birth to us or raises us will be fit into our picture.
If we expect (reflected in our chart through aspects to the Moon) a kind and gentle mother we will be acutely aware of all times when she is kind, loving and attentive.  We will put blinders on or make excuses when she is harsh or distant.  We will interact with our mother in ways that will bring out the best of her nurturing instincts; we will behave as a happy and content child.  If we come into the world with the expectation of a harsh or cruel mother, we will interpret her expressions and her actions with that filter.  We will be less apt to notice her kindness and will interact with her in ways that will be more difficult for her to respond to with kindness.
If we are able to look at our patterns, our expectations and all our relationships with curiosity and open awareness we will likely notice how we know of the reality of the people closest to us.  We may notice how we find people to fit our patterns and our expectations.
If your parents are still alive, take into consideration the next time you see them that you may not know them very well at all.  After all, how well do you think they know you?
The same principle functions in reverse and in our other relationships as well.
Call – or email – me to set up a time to look at some of these patterns in your own life.  Awareness can start the process of transforming the difficult patterns in our relationships.

The Past Meets The Future!

Saturn and Uranus face off in opposition today, the 3rd in a series of 5.
(24 degrees Virgo – Pisces)

With the first of this series of oppositions happening on November 4th, 2008, Barack Obama was elected President of the United States.  The second, during February  of 2009, demanded that we face the unfolding disaster of our economic system.

We watch now to see what the rest of this series of oppositions will bring. Curently we have the Health Care Reform to watch, the potential conflict with China and many other political and social instabilities in every corner of our planet.

Let us think about what an opposition means and what it calls forth in us, what it requires from us, personally and collectively.

Many years ago, I read (I don’t remember the author) a metaphor for an opposition that has stuck in my mind.  Let us imagine ourselves standing in our home – hearing a knock at the front and back door at the same time.  How do we make the decision of which door to answer?  Do we ignore the back door bell because we only want to see the person we think is at the front door?  Do we answer the back door because it is closer to where we are standing and then forget that there was a knock on the front door?  Do we ignore both and hide in our room because we imagine there will be conflict that we don’t want to deal with?  What if we go to each door, one at a time and invite each guest to sit at the table together?  What if we approach the situation with open curiosity, no matter how confrontational our guests may be?

This particular opposition between Saturn and Uranus happens every 42 to 45 years.  It is important that we not underestimate the importance of this occurrence to each of us individually and as a human family!
The last time this occurred was from1964 through 1967.  These were amazingly significant and intense years.  What are the similarities now to this last Saturn – Uranus opposition?  The sparring of the conservative and the liberal factions of the culture were certainly as intense then as they are now.  The issues of militarization, social issues, human rights issues, are parallel in 2009 to what they were in 1966 and in some inexplicable way, there is a ‘feeling’, a sense of being, which is amazingly similar!  Certainly there were other astrological factors involved at that time (as there are now), but the Opposition between Saturn and Uranus were a huge part of the experience of the 1960’s.

Once again, we watch as the culture polarizes.  Change has been pushing on the status quo with ever increasing intensity.  It is hard to remember what the world was like even two years ago.

It is easy to jump on the band wagon, the one that naturally aligns with our thinking, to be passionately committed to that one side.  We forget that there is an equal humanity on the other side, even though we may not understand their values and ideals.  It seems to be human nature to make ‘the others’, those we do not agree with, into the enemy. We preach to the choir, we become self righteous, we know our side in the conflict is right and the other side is wrong!  I wonder however, about the wisdom of negating the side we most naturally disagree with.

To grow, to move forward we must look at each side in any confrontation, we must invite both guests to the table and listen to what each is saying.  We must, in turn, look each other in the eye and find a way to acknowledge where we are in agreement and look deeply for an understanding and acceptance of the areas where we are in total disagreement.

We must come to an understanding of the humanity behind the issues, to understand that each side holds a separate part of human understanding and the human condition, really just opposite sides of the same coin, of the same issue.  Each side is equally afraid of losing something that is dear and important to their survival and the survival of those they love.

Respect must be given to both the wisdom of stability and the necessity of change.  We must listen, understand, respect and continue to move forward.

Fear is a powerful force that keeps us all stuck, unable to move forward.
The new versus the old, it is all about fear, fear of losing security (Saturn), and fear of change (Uranus).

We must come to understand where we stand, in our culture and in our personal lives.  As Saturn and Uranus oppose we must accept that what was, is no longer.  We have no choice but to change.  No matter how frightening it may be, the past is left behind.  Uranus is the principle that blasts open doors no matter how hard we may try to hold back the force.  It is the blinding flash of electrical power that leaves the past in shatters.  There really is no looking back, no going back.  Everything now must be rebuilt anew.

Saturn represents the Old (the past, stability), Uranus represents the New (the future, change), as such Uranus ultimately has to win – it is the energy that brings the future into being.  However, we must not underestimate the resistance, within the culture or within ourselves.

The dates of this occurrence this time around (note that the first was on the US election day!):
* November 4, 2008 – 18 degrees mutable
* February 5, 2009 – 20 degrees mutable
* September 15, 2009 – 24 degrees mutable
* April 27, 2010 – 28 degrees mutable
* July 26, 2010 – 0 degrees cardinal
If you are going through major changes in your own life that fit the archetypes of these planets, there is a good change that this opposition is occurring in connection with personal planets or angles in your own horoscope.

Are you at a crossroad, feeling the need for major change and yet experiencing great resistance externally or internally?  Are you looking for a new perspective? Are you struggling to accept your life or do you need to find the strength to make radical changes?

Let the Universe Support Your Growth

Call or write to me to set up a consultation!

Take Off Your Watch, Mercury is Retrograde Again!

Mercury turns retrograde three times per year,
during which time it appears as if Mercury is moving in reverse direction.
September 6th – September 29th 2009

Over the years, I have noticed that people who know nothing about Astrology have heard about Mercury retrograde. It is something that we hear spoken of in the culture even if we know nothing beyond Sun Sign Astrology. We hear that things break down; cars, computers, electronics.

Communications get messy, people are late and misunderstandings occur. “Maybe Mercury is retrograde!” we hear when things go wrong!

During this time things are not as they ordinarily are, we must take a different line of understanding, we must slow ourselves down and do some preparation in order to move forward comfortably. More accurately, we must move backward a bit in order to move forward.

When people hear that Mercury is retrograde they get nervous, they worry. Perhaps it is human nature; people like to be afraid, just a little bit. They also like to have something to blame when the little things go wrong.

With a bit of thought and a little conscious preparation, Mercury’s retrograde period can be an empowering time. A time to go back and repair things that were left behind.

It seems that in our culture we are taught that the right way to do things is to constantly move forward, to push move ahead and never look back. Going back is counterintuitive; we are impatient and somehow feel that once we are done with something we must keep moving on to the next thing.

When Mercury is retrograde, it is not a good time to move aggressively forward. It is a time to slow down and look behind. Look back over the past few months – what did we leave undone, what was never completed or was left for someone else to clean up.

When we rush to the next thing, leaving something incomplete or not up to standard, the negative side of Mercury retrograde shows itself. We stumble, things get lost, we are misunderstood, systems break down.

Let the next thing wait. Take some time to reflect. Research. Review. Revise. Rethink. Redo. Rework. Re-examine. Re-asses. Revise. Rehearse. Re-organize.

And perhaps even take some time to dream. Set aside your schedule. Meditate. Take off your watch. Read a book and count the stones in the river or the stars in the sky.

15 Minues of Fame?!

An article about my work in the local newspaper – The Burlington Free Press!
Part of my 15 minutes of fame?!

My 6 Leo Planets and my Moon in Aries sure do feel shiny tonight!

Contact me at or 802-338-2098.

The mystery of Pisces

The Moon is so Full, so beautiful in Pisces tonight. Dream, drift, reminisce, meditate, fantasize, allow transcendence, open to escapism, imagination or spirit. Feel reality somewhere nearby, do not call it closer. Sweeter to keep the veil in place, to allow one’s self that soothing sense of vague unknowing.

How does one feed a Pisces Moon? What is it to tap into this energy? & what can it tell us about those who are born with this placement?
I know that Pisces is intended to be outside of what we can understand and yet I hate feeling so clueless! With a strong Pisces planets or a strong placement of Neptune it is likely easier to understand this energy – even for those who have a difficult time articulating it.

Noel Tyl says that those born with this placement “need to identify the ideal, understand impressions & work with the intangible”. I roll those words through my mind over and over.

Pisces always intrigued me and yet my lack of understanding was an annoyance. I have a hard time accepting what is so foreign to my internal make up.

Some 20 years ago, I met a young man whose chart made many connections to my Leo planets and yet his Moon was in Pisces. He knew his way around the language of astrology so I thought perhaps I would enlist his help in learning to better understand Pisces. He assured me that if I would spend one full day with him I would forever understand Pisces. I was intrigued and agreed to spend the next day with him.

I picked him up very early in the morning and we parked my car in downtown Burlington Vermont. It was a very beautiful summer morning; we walked slowly to the water, the stunningly beautiful Lake Champlain. He had shared nothing with me about how we were to spend our day. We went to the King Street Dock, rented a canoe and paddled out further into the lake than what I was comfortable with (just another sign of how uncomfortable I have always been with the depth and emotion of the Water signs – I do not even know how to swim!). Once out on the lake, far from the rest of the world (or so it seemed) my friend pulled out some medicinal herbs, which we proceeded to imbibe!

It was one of those precious few idyllic days that Vermont gets only in August. We spent the day floating on the lake, feeling every tremor of the motion of the lake. We took turns laying on the bottom of the canoe, absorbing the motion, the sense of what is unknowable.

When evening came we paddled to shore and walked back through town to my car. As I drove him home, my friend asked me: “Do you understand the energy of Pisces now?”

At that point, I was not sure I understood anything, my head felt like it had all day been in a cloud. Intangibility, impressions, passive and dreamy – that certainly had been my experience of the day. Perhaps now I did understand. The surreal, soft vagueness of our conversation as we floated in space and time. It left an impression on me. In the elusive sense of escapism I did take an understanding of the feeling behind this watery sign; within the essence of Pisces.

Now, when I encounter the energy of Pisces, the dreamy sensitive depth of feeling that I received, that beautiful summer day, is always there for me to tap into.

Hummm… Neptune does Quindicile my Moon, perhaps I should give that some thought!

I will always be grateful to my friend for teaching me the intangibility of Pisces.

Are you at a crossroad in your life? Are your circumstances other than what you expected?

We can meet for an individual consultations (Burlington, Vermont), by telephone, or on SKYPE!

Life Transitions Require New Perspectives!

It is my goal to empower you in the exploration of the past, present and future of your life.

Let's talk. There is so much to learn and understand.

~ Laurie